Gnome Insults

[Silver Knight]

http://www.youtube.com/v/6r-d0HCKMK4&autoplay=1&replay=1

[meetdadoom]

Gnomes get annoying when you buy a home with a gnome you can't find. I bought a house and had sex with my wife and while they are having sex you hear the gnome giving insults.

[Silver Knight]

 Good Advice 

   
• "Always look both ways before crossing a road."
• "You should never try to move an injured person."
• "Eat your vegetables."
• "Don't play with matches."
• "Never leave home without a hat."
• "Start each day with a healthy breakfast."
• "Never eat wild mushrooms. They might be toadstools."

Insults  General Insults

   
• "Sure is a beautiful day... Except where you're standing!"
• "I feel like celebrating today. Because today's the day you die!"
• "Seeing you brings back memories... Of wanting my eyes gouged out!"
• "You know what I like most about people? They die."
• "I sensed your presence before you even arrived. What did you eat?!"
• "Ha! [laugh] You're funny. But looks aren't everything."
• "I'd like to get to know someone like you... And then drown them."
• "I've said it before and I'll say it again - I hate you."
• "I was hoping you'd come 'round. I could use a good laugh."
• "I'm not like those mean gnomes. I'm a million times worse."
• "You should go somewhere nice and peaceful. Like a cemetery!"
• "I can't decide if I like your looks or your personality better. It's like comparing mud to sewage."
• "Sometimes I just want someone to talk to. And sometimes I want someone to kick in the crotch!"
• "Excuse me, do you have the time... To get stuffed?!"
• "Winter's my favourite season. I love the snow. And that's when most people die!"
• "You remind me of my mother. She was fat and ugly too!"
• "If I had a friend like you, I could tell them secrets. Like that I'm going to set you on fire."
• "If it were up to me, no one would ever get sick. They'd just die, starting with you!"
• "Oh, I didn't notice you there. How do you like being so insignificant?"
• "We could be best friends, if I liked people with an arse for a face!"
• "I could help you find what you're looking for. Step one: Pull your head out your arse!"
• "My favourite things are music and sunshine and love. And pain."
• "It's a great day to be alive, and a better day to kill."
• "Are you lost? Can I help you starve and die?!"
• "Philosopers tell us that there are those who create, those who destroy... And those who are wankers, like you!"
• "There's our noble hero. Our big, fat, stupid, ugly noble hero."
• "Oh you are sweet. Like a bloody great tart!"
• "Here comes the one who will save the land. Ha! I say let it burn!"

Weapon Related

   
• "Nice weapon you've got there. What are you, compensating for something?!"
• "I think your weapon might be bent. Oh no wait, that's you!"

Morality Related

   
• "That skin... Not a lot of people could pull that off. I'd like to pull it off! C'mere!"

To Male Heroes

   
• "The ladies must really love you. You could share makeup tips and trade shoes!"
• "You look familiar. Oh yeah, I remember, you look like this girly I used to shag!"
• "You certainly are a big, strong hero... For a lady."
• "Look at you - rippling muscles, broad shoulders, a squared jaw... You sure are one weird looking lady!"
• "I can tell you where there's a nice big chest of gold coins... You can use them to buy yourself some new handbags!"
• "For my money, men make the best heroes. Present company excepted, of course."
• "You really got your mother's looks. Eww."
• "Blue is a nice colour for you. You should pick out a nice blue dress!"

To Female Heroes

   
• "Are you lost, milady? I can direct you to the nearest kitchen."
• "Look, it's the lady hero. You're not going to drone on about equal pay for equal work, are you?"
• "Well well, a young lady. Make yourself useful and bring me a cup of tea."
• "There are a lot of problems in the world. It's going to take one big, strong man to fix them."
• "You're going to make someone very happy... If he likes ugly birds with no personality!"
• "Those are nice shoes, but don't you think your gran's feet are cold without them?!"
• "You really got your father's looks. Eww."
• "It's a lady hero. Why don't you come over here, love, and show me the goods!"

To Good Heroes

   
• "You are so righteous, so pure of heart. It makes me want to vomit! [gag]"
• "I like that halo above your head. It will come in useful when I strangle you!"
• "No one exemplifies goodness like you do. Nope. They've all got better things to do!"
• "People love a virtuous hero. You know why? Because people are idiots! I hate them."
• "You are so noble. Yeah, that's not boring."
• "Oh, noble one. Maybe you're the one who can save the world. Although, more than likely, you'll just fail miserably."
• "You seem like a very nice person. I kill nice people, you know."
• "I can't remember the last time I came across a person as noble as you... But that's because I hang out around people that are interesting!"

To Evil Heroes

   
• "You are one evil hero. What's the matter, too lazy to be good?!"
• "You've got darkness in your soul. I can smell it! Oh, no wait, I think that's your breath!"
• "I knew someone more evil than you once... My gran! And all her friends!"
• "You are the embodiment of pure evil. Ask me if I give a toss!"
• "You seem like a nice person..."
• "You're the scariest thing since... Since that chipmunk ran by ten minutes ago."

To Fat Heroes

   
• "You look like you've found a great deal of treasure... And eaten it!"
• "You remind me of a hero from long ago. Except you're a big fat version!"
• "Men and beasts fear you. Fruits and veg, they know they're safe."
• "The other day a little boy threw a rock at me. Broke my chin. Can I borrow one of yours?!"
• "What a nice dog. I'd watch your back, doggy - looks like your master eats everything in sight!"

Suggestive Comments

   
• "When people tell you you're good, they mean you're a goody-two-shoes. When they say I'm good, they mean I'm a fiend in the sack!"
• "Does the great hero need more excitement? How about you come sit on my pointy hat?!"
• "Well that was exciting. How about you come over here and show me the goods!"
• "I'd like to come 'round your house for tea. And then I'd have your mum."

Dog Related

   
• "I like to think about puppies - about slowly, slowly crushing them."
• "Heeere doggy, doggy, come over here and die."
• "That's a nice doggy... If you like skinny little ugly runts!"
• "I had a doggy once. Had him with mash and mushy peas!"
• "Dogs are noble, loyal and faithful. They're right tasty too!"
• "Ohhhh, I love doggies. I love throwing them into the river in a sack."
• "Oooh, look at the doggy. Looks delicious!"
• "Must be nice being able to lick your own privates. But doesn't that embarrass your dog?!"
• "You stink, you mongrel. Maybe you rolled in something... Or your dog did!"
• "Hey doggy, play dead. And never mind the playing part!"
• "Oh look, he's wagging his tail! Maybe he's thinking about eating crap."

When Attacking the Gnome with Magic

   
• "That tingles! [laugh] D-do it again!"
• "I've never had it like this. Ooh, you're a naughty one!"
• "Oooh yeah. Ha! Oh that's the stuff baby, yeah!"

To Brian

   
• "You're a twat!"
• "Your mother!" [At the beggining of the 'Gnomes are Evil!' quest.]

While in the Gnome Garden Before Quest End

   
• "I'm going to drown you in that bloody pond"
• "You're Dead!"
• "I'm going to rip your eyeballs out!"
• "Remember this day, the last day you were ever safe!"
• "Think I'm scared? Boo whoo I am bloody terrified."
• "Your days are numbered!"
• "I'm going to figure a way out of here then I'm coming for you!"
• "This isn't the end, it is only the beginning!"
• "I'm going to bring you down on your head! Hear me?"
• "You let me go right now"
• "You're going to DIE! Everybody's going to die!"
• "I've killed for less."
• "I'll have you for this."
• "When I get out of here you are so dead!"
• "You think you can hold me here?"
• "Yep you best keep me frozen here, if I ever get free I'll stomp ya!"
• "Come over here and fight me you coward!"
• "I'm going to haunt your nightmares, and when you wake up shaking, I'll be there to kill you!"
• "I'm warning you get me out of here or there be trouble!"
• "Go out and grab another Gnome, I'll give you an idea of where you can put it!"

Misc. After completing Gnomes are Evil quest if you walk past the bush near the Brightwall Acadamy with a silver key chest behind it, a Gnome like voice sometimes says:

   
• "Who said that? Couldn't have been that garden gnome."
• "Nothing out of the ordinary here."
• He's coming! He's COMING!"
• "SHHHHHHHHHHH!"
• "ex-nay on the alking-tay."
• "Quiet or he'll smash us up!"

[meetdadoom]

Someone has WAY too much time on their hands.

[GeneralGold]

Someone has WAY too much time on their hands.

And someone is always busy working on Crussaria and etc... maybe copy and paste?

[Ralazo]

i love the game and its humor lol